Still Have So Many Things To Learn

"Not Keeping" By Faye Wong


I always feel embarrassed when everytime I have difficulties in explaining something with others. This is not just a simple language problem, I even have this problem with Chinese. After setting off from the center of the life circle, people become more and more difficult to communicate with. As long as you move further along your specific radius, no matter which direction you chose, you are more and more far away from others' radii. This is kind of sad, especially if you still have a dream deep in the heart that you will meet someone who can really understand you.

Let alone those damsel dreams, I know I am too greedy. The problem will certainly become unsolved if you want to share with an American how beautiful the ancient Chinese language is, or tell a Chinese how much you adore the passions come from the Japanese idol culture, or argue with a French anarchist about the Asian philosophy of family and country. Things are complex, languages are barriers, histories are distinct, people are abstruse.

I know we certainly can not make everyone on planete happy at the same time, but still I want to have good communications and vital connections. However, as I learn more from different cultures, things become more difficult. Then I even started to have difficulties in going deeper inside different cultures because of the fear of being abandoned by other groups' of people. --If you want to belong to the whole world, then you belong to nowhere. What a sad truth meanwhile a greedy nature.

But sometimes, the vital connections do appear unexpectedly. Like this weekend, I went to Riverside to visit my friend. Since I don't have a car yet, I went there by train, which is slow but full of fun. I met an old lady on train who was reading a book about Henry VIII's last wife. The book became a connection point which led us to a happy conversation about the King's six wives, plus some unofficial history about the English Royal Families. The sunset lighted up the old lady's wrinkled face, as though life was stretching out along those late afternoon sunshines. And the conversation made me remember how much I desired to learn about the whole world in different ways when I decided to change my major.

Then some words from my favorate Japanese writer Haruki Murakami appeared: "I hope my writings could be some kinds of connections which can join up people beneath their daily masks. " My heart felt so warm when I started to think in this way about why there is Music and Art on the planet. At least people are trying to communicate and can somehow connect through the whole human history, at least there are so many tiny but shining points that people get connected with each other, at least I refound some good reasons for continuing my desire towards learning.

Still have so many things to learn, I would be proud if this would be my whole life process and even the ending point. But how about those damsel dreams? Just forget it, who is not lonely on this planet...







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